Gift-giving: We are asked to find the perfect gift and bombarded by commercials, mind-reading, and materialism. You are more than a gift to those you care for and if you are feeling anxiety about this it is because you want more of a connection to them than just a gift.
Financial burdens: We work incredibly hard to stay within our own means. But the pressure of society and “keeping up with the Jones” is real! When you feel anxiety about your finances ground yourself and feel resolved that you do not have to spend to enjoy the holidays.
Hosting: You want to create that magical and perfect experience for loved ones that come to visit. Your heart is in the right place to want to spread your holiday joy to others, but not at the expense of over people-pleasing and worrying about everyone around you. When you feel anxiety while hosting, breathe, and look around. You are doing great. It is not your job to please everyone.
Social situations: Meeting new family? Being around the in-laws? Going to work or other social functions while having social anxiety? That is incredibly taxing! When you feel anxiety about this it is okay to know your limits and embrace them.
Family dynamics: Your family has it own challenges and history this will create anxiety because somethings are un-resolved or you know from the past there is a good chance “so-and-so” will act a certain way. When you feel this anxiety set your own boundaries on how much you want to engage with that person or that dynamic. It is not worth the mental and emotional toll; it is okay to feel this way.
Past-memories to live up to: Remember that last Holiday when we did…? You feel so much anxiety trying to live up to the expectations of past experiences as a kid, in a previous relationship, or with your loved ones. This is a new holiday and you have changed over time. It cannot be the same. Create new memories and new traditions; do not limit yourself.
Travel: You are running from this place to that place, visiting this family and that family, and planning your time down to the last minute to make sure you make an appearance at all places. There is no shame in placing healthy boundaries to cherish the time you have during the holiday and with whom you choose.
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This post does not replace professional therapeutic help or constitute advice, seek your own therapist today!
